La musique ...

I found a nice page yesterday which you have to pay for ... At least if you want to use all the features. However, a "basic account" there is free. Downside? You have to give them your postal adress, and I currently wonder why ... It is a page where you can find musicians who are looking for bands or single band members, but who also would play only from time to time. I think that it would be a good way of getting over my boredom, my solitude, whatever. Yeah, I must sound really depressive now :P.

Whatever. I guess that, even if I found somebody on this page, I wouldn*t continue staying in contact with them. Which is my own fault, I know. The last time I was looking for band members sort of made me angry and feel even more lonely, or laughed at. I think nobody deserves being treated this way. On the other hand, I*d need a room, some space, to play with others. PLUS : Jam Sessions? This sounds like "We don*t want any 'beginners' to play with us!" ... Even though I am definitely not a beginner anymore. But I am not even close to advanced ...

I want to have a band. But beforehand, I guess I have to figure some things out by myself. I already know its name, and I want us to play at festivals and whatnot. If only I knew what style the music would be ... If I may say this, I would love to invent a music genre of my own. I wouldn*t know how to call it, but I don*t want to copy anybody else. I have various instruments I like - both exotic as well as "old" ones. However, would it be more ... Electronic? Or "organic"? I don*t know ...

I feel so tired and sick of everything, it has to get out of me. I know music is a good way to get to that point. Like, my own music therapy. I want to set up a plan of what to do ... But I know I might not stick to it anyways. Maybe if I didn*t set a certain date or something? It wouldn*t set me under that much pressure ...

*switches on "Promenade" by Közi and instantly feels better*

(Isn*t it strange what one song can do? :D) I should maybe search for another page like this first. Maybe I will find some people. Not directly for a band, but friends to make music with :). To meet up and play something from time to time. But no jam sessions at first! I can improvise, but only as long as there*s nobody else playing along Oô ... Mh. And maybe I shouldn*t put too much pressure on me at first -- even though I have to admit this is kinda hard. But, it is easier to solve various little problems than one big one. So ...

LET*S GO!! ^_____________^