Very recently ...

I don*t like stealing this from other people, BUT recently a friend of mine linked to this article on fitocracy. Reading through it somehow helped the self-bashing side of me, which DOES EXIST, to really try to focus on doing more of what I want to do, both eating-wise and sport-wise. Sport-wise is somewhat easy; usually I love sports that are not that monotonous, that require quick decisions sometimes, that also (partly) allow improvisation, and so on.

All in all, I am a huge fan of dancing. Many different kinds of dancing, even. :D Although maybe some people wouldn*t suspect it, I do adore industrial dancing, hiphop dancing, bellydancing, parapara (Yes, I count this as something extra :P), hoop dancing, and, and, and ... As for industrial dancing, you might come along this video when looking for examples. (I just love the "try-to-dance-industrial group" in the beginning because they don*t take themselves too seriously. Which is absolutely a plus!!)

But then there*s the eating point. I already cut out soda several weeks ago, and am doing fine with sticking to that, yet I don*t know what else I could do. All sides do tend to claim "Our product is best!!", and while some say, "No carbs!", others are against fat, and whatnot. Some also say that you shouldn*t eat anything after 6pm.

My problem is, I need breakfast, and one diet I have been doing says "Only fruits as breakfast, and on the weekends / on two days of the week, you can eat a musli or two slices of bread!" ... If I don*t get something "nice" for breakfast, I get really grumpy and tend to verbally attack others. It has happened before, and it is not nice.

Then, at lunch time, I don*t have many problems adjusting to certain plans. But since I eat breakfast (as in, slices of bread/musli) every day, I am scared now that this might not reduce weight that much? :( I am an ovo-lacto-vegetarian, too, but have been that ever since I was 11 years old (so approximately 18 years now). I*d *love* to go vegan, though. The thing is, whatsoever, I have cats, and I don*t want to feed them vegan food, so I will still have to support the ones slaughtering animals :(. [So it is also a thought/ideology problem!] However, I*d love to try it. I have seen some really good vegan cooking books, so ... :)

And meals in the evening are not that important, either. I don*t like eating too "heavy" meals then, though. Do you have any tips or ideas concerning this? =)

She*s dangerous.

Hello.

How have you enjoyed the past few days? I myself wrote songs (well, two of them), renovated, and read in two different books. I just wanted to come here and say "Hi", after all.

Somehow while looking over the past entries, I sort of started to miss posting the diet results, to give you one example. I definitely think I need to focus on my eating habits again because, although I have been mostly doing a weight-loss diet, I somehow lost track & ate a lot of stuff I was not exactly planning to eat. Not to mention I sometimes really think I am suffering from an ED again, but that*s a totally different story after all ...

I wish I could write more about this (maybe it would help some passers-by after all), but I also don*t want to trigger anybody nor make anybody feel bad about themselves just because of some stupid thing I wrote.

Let*s hope it will go back to normal again. I really hate the pressure I put onto myself, not to mention the fact I tend to rephrase in my mind everything food-related somebody else tells me, in a not-so-nice way.

~R.

Passions.

Heyho :D.

Today*s entry won*t be about the project, but about something else ... I know of a whole bunch of blogs, all dedicated to single topics, which I *love* reading. :) Okay, I have some blogs on all kinds of subjects, but still sometimes feel overwhelmed by the task to write in these ... It is not that I don*t like them, but I often fear I am so engaged in several different topics of my life that it*d take ~56456498462 blogs to cover all my interests. :P But that*s fine of course, I just feel that exactly *this blog* is all over the place. Is this a bad thing? I am not sure.

I actually really want to be more active. Most of my thoughts are put into posts at other places, but I often feel that I needn*t be so ashamed of them that I hide them wherever I go. The world needs to know my thoughts, the world needs to know what is going on in my mind! :P

At times, I was scared of "da haterz", but then again, who gives a flying *EFF* about them? I had times when people randomly attacked me for what I wrote on my homepages (the old ones, you know), and very often this led to me being insecure about myself, my thoughts, my approaches toward life, just because of a bunch of morons who think that their attitude can change what is going on inside of me ... But it is up to me who will win after all. :P (*thought* "This is leading in a strange direction ..." *slaps thought*)

It*s not like I cannot stand criticism ... But it always depends on what effort the person saying things put into phrasing their statements in general! I think, after all, everybody is free to go in the direction they want creativity-wise, and that it is up to them how they express themselves. Life is about self-expression after all, and creativity can come in various forms!! It is not something that only a few people host within their souls, it is something we all are to a certain extend; namely the extend dictated by boundaries others put upon us.

And with this, having stars in my eyes, I will leave you again. But not for that long ... I hope you will enjoy the randomness of this blog & stay with me for ... ever :). If you want to, that is.

Somehow ...

I assume many thought this to be dead, and actually, for quite some time, I thought the same. But it is NOT dead, and I will show you :D.

I am planning a new project actually :). It will be linked here once I have the time to do it or finish it, that is (D*oh!). Please don*t explode from the excitement rising inside of you, just stay cool, take a drink or two (or three ...), and wait :D.

I wuv you all!!